Short Jokes's blog

Who Stole Our Steed?

This just in from http://jokesandsayings.net  A tandem team rode into town and stopped at a saloon for a cold drink. Unfortunately, the locals always had a habit of picking on strangers, which they were. When they finished their drinks, they found their steed had been stolen. They go back into the bar, the captain handily flips his gun into the air, catches it above his head without even looking and fires a shot into the ceiling. "WHICH ONE OF YOU SIDEWINDERS STOLE OUR STEED?" he yelled with surprising forcefulness. No one answered. "ALL RIGHT WE'RE GONNA HAVE ANOTHA COLD DRINK, AND IF OUR STEED AIN'T BACK OUTSIDE BY THE TIME WE FINISH, WE'RE GONNA DO WHAT WE DUN IN TEXAS! AND WE DON'T LIKE TO HAVE TO DO WHAT WE DUN IN TEXAS!" Some of the locals shifted restlessly. They had another cold drink, walked outside, and the tandem is back! They mount up and start to ride out of town. The bartender wanders out of the bar and asks, "Say partner, before you go... what did happen in Texas?" The captain turned back and said, "We had to walk home." http://jokesandsayings.net

Funny Jokes

Joke Of The Day

Checking out of the grocery store, I noticed that the bag boy was eyeing my two adopted children curiously. They often draw scrutiny, since my son is a blond Russian, while my daughter has shiny black Haitian skin. The boy, who had been previously telling funny jokes, continued staring as he carried our groceries to the car. Finally, he asked. "Those your kids?" "Yes, they are!" I answered proudly. "They adopted?" he asked. "Yes," I replied. "I thought so," he concluded. "I figured you're too old to have kids that small."

Funny Jokes

Untitled

lately ive been distancing myself from everyone everyone was worried about me without this my life would be miserable!!
http://arata5acapella.web.fc2.com//DanielKing98.html I am headed right for the top you are cut out for thisFunny Jokes

Generous lawyer

http://JokesAndSayings.net Generous lawyer A local United Way office realized that the organization had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute. "Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $500,000, you give not a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to the community in some way?" The lawyer mulled this over for a moment and replied, "First, did your research also show that my mother is dying after a long illness, and has medical bills that are several times her annual income?" Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbled, "Um ... no." The lawyer interrupts, "or that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair?" The stricken United Way rep began to stammer out an apology, but was interrupted again. "or that my sister's husband died in a traffic accident," the lawyer's voice rising in indignation, "leaving her penniless with three children?!" The humiliated United Way rep, completely beaten, said simply, "I had no idea..." On a roll, the lawyer cut him off once again, "So if I don't give any money to them, why should I give any to you?"

Funny Jokes

Redneck Joke

Breaking joke from http://jokesandsayings.net Two rednecks meet on a dusty country road. One of them is carrying a big bag labeled, "chickens." "Chickens, eh?" says one guy. "Hey, if I guess how many chickens you got, will you give me one?" "Heck," says the guy with the bag, "iffin you guess right, I'll give you both of 'em." The other scratches his head and guesses, "Um... five?"

Jokes, Funny

Pros & Cons

http://jokesandsayings.net bulletin...

"This house," said the real estate salesman, "has both its good points and its bad points. To show you I'm honest, I'm going to tell you about both.

The disadvantages are that there is a chemical plant one block south and a slaughterhouse a block north."

"What are the advantages?" inquired the prospective buyer.

"The advantage is that you can always tell which way the wind is blowing!"

Peace out,

Joke Genie

Jokes, Funny

This Teacher Joke Is Peachy

http://JokesAndSayings.net/Jokes-Funny says...

 

 

Girl: My teacher's a peach.

 

Mother: You mean she's sweet.

 

Girl: No, she has a heart of stone.

Jokes, Funny

Is there a person in your life who always has a hug and makes you feel better when they're around? Who is it – and what do you love about them?

http://jokesandsayings.net/jokes-funny

TypePad Conversations » Answer this question!

Dumb Money Joke

Why is money called dough?

Because we all knead it.

Short Jokes

Boss Wife Advice

http://jokesandsayings.net says:

Hung Chow calls into work and says, " Hey, I am not coming to work today, I am really sick. I have a headache, stomach ache and legs hurt. I am not coming to work."

The boss says, " I really need you today. When I feel like this, I go to my wife and tell her to give me sex. That makes everything better and I go to work. You try that."

Two hours later Hung Chow calls again. "I did what you say and I feel great. I be at work soon. By the way, you have a nice house!

Short Jokes